3.Harry ＆ Rhonda
Frank zappa (guitar, synclavier)
Steve vai (guitar)
Ray white (guitar, vocals)
Tommy mars (keyboards)
Chuck wild (piano)
Arthur barrow (bass)
Scott thunes (bass)
Jay anderson (string bass)
Ed mann (percussion)
Chad wackerman (drums)
Ike willis (vocals)
Terry bozzio (vocals)
Dale bozzio (vocals)
Napoleon murphy brock (vocals)
Bob harris (vocals)
Johnny 'guitar' watson (vocals)
Rhonda： (stage whisper)
Harry, this is not dream girls!
Harry： (stage whisper)
They told me it had c-c-colored folk in it, rhonda, and that's
always a sure sign of good, solid, musical entertainment! how
was i supposed to know they'd be this ugly？
Rhonda：
They pissed on us, harry! they fuckin' pissed on us! look at my
fox!
Harry：
I know, dear...but they pissed on me too...he did say they were
incontinent!
Rhonda：
Just smell this! i think we should get out of here before they
do something else to us!
Harry：
Leave？ now？ at these ticket prices？ just hold your horses...it
probably wasn't real piss... only 'theater piss'...they probably
have a formula... some special stuff... comes right outta the
fur w
Oolite.
Rhonda：
What's happened to broadway, harry？ used to be you could come to
one of these things and the wind would be rushing down the plain
or a fairy on a string would go over the audience...but now! har
Ask you： is this entertainment？
Harry：
You're absolutely correct, dear! so far we haven't seen a single
good-looking pair of legs...a single sequin-encrusted
whatchamacallit ...no firm, rounded breasts! this show is a
disaster, rhond
Complete and utter disaster!
Thing-fish：
Mmmm! say dere...hey! umm-hmm! thass right! hey you! you two
ugly white folks...over heahhh!
As you know, de presence of carboniferous hard-core
unemployables has gen'rally, in de historical past, guaranteed
an evenin' of upliftin' frolic and cavortment...it'd be a shame
fo y'all t'miss
On dis here one! got some nice chairs fo' ya, rights ovuh
heahhh.
Harry ＆ rhonda rise, cross to thing-fish, and sit in the chairs
he offers. they are immediately chained to them by the mammies.
Harry：
Uhhh...beg pardon？ what's going on here？
Rhonda：
Oh! they're touching me! harry! harry! harry! harry, do
something! they're putting chains on me! i'll be stuck to the
chair! oh! what'll i do？ i'll miss intermission!
Harry：
They're only 'theater chains', rhonda! just some sort of...
Rhonda：
These are real goddam chains, harry, and they're not gonna come
off with woolite!
Harry：
I don't mind the way they feel...they don't bother me,
honey...relax! go with the flow...
Rhonda：
Harry, you are an over-educated shit-head!
Thing-fish：
Look here, folks...dis only fo yo own protexium! once we gets
rollin' heah, things be happnin' all over de place dat could
prove dangerous to persons not previously acquainted wit de san
quentim
- potatoes!
Rhonda：
I want the wind to come rushing down the plain! i want fairies
on a string over the audience! i want real broadway
entertainment! feathers! spot-lights! guilt! hours upon hours of
guilt! about m
Her! about my father! about brave women, suffering at the hands
of infantile, insensitive, dominating men! and what do i get？ a
potato-headed jig-a-boo with catholic clothes on!
incomprehensible
Lips! weak bladders draining through abnorminably large organs!
jesus, harry! what the fuck is going on here？
Harry：
Simmer down! if you'll just roll with the punches...and don't
rock the boat, i'm sure we'll have a lovely evening at the
theater!
Thing-fish：
Thass right! we got fairies on a string fo yo ass jes' a little
later! meanwhile, i b'lieves y'all requires some updatement on
de co-log-nuh situatium! sister ob'dewlla 'x'! express yo'seff!
| 
